The New Song Completed hr597

At long last, my new song is finally complete. It took about five years to finish it, which seemed too long, but my previous song took more. That previous song of mine was my everything. I had always craved just one song that I could think I was born to write, that represented myself, my life. The song was exactly what I had been after. Since I put everything I had into the song, I was almost going to retire when I finished it. I said all things I had wanted to say to the world and summoned up all skills I had to the maximum in the song. I thought I had nothing left in me. But once I tried to retire, I found myself at a loss. Nothing except for music interested me. I also realized I couldn’t do anything well other than music. I decided to continue writing songs and singing, by way of retirement. I set about my new song with an easy mindset intending to make light work of it because I considered my chief song done. However, it didn’t go that way. As I went on, I couldn’t help working seriously. My easy attitude toward the new song quickly vanished. The more I worked on the song, the deeper I was in it. The concept of retirement was simply pushed away. I even revised the words and the song became profound. I was as focused and eagerly desired perfection as for the previous song. As a result, it took five years while at first I had meant to finish it in a week. I put everything I had again in the end, and I was filled with rapture that I didn’t feel in my everyday life when the new song was completed. The feeling lingered for several days and I didn’t feel like doing anything. It was like all energy was drained out of me and I was absent-minded all the time. It seemed I lost my concentration as a whole. I knocked off a glass and wasted my drink that I never do, though I’m clumsy and a regular dropper. Even my bowels were loose. The completion of a song doesn’t necessarily mean all the work is over. I need to make a backup of all data, store them, convert to several different formats, release publicly, arrange distribution, and so on. Although those mountainous tasks of post production await me, I still have a thick head and haven’t gotten down to it for a few weeks now. I noticed that I was less anxious to release and promote my new song than before. I used to get down to post production right after a new song was completed so as to make it public quickly. But I don’t have zest for it as I did before. It’s probably because I don’t expect the world so much any more and my trust in human beings has decreased over the years. I’ve learned that songs in which I do my best and with which I’m satisfied completely don’t have to do with the market. My previous song proved it. The song was fruition in which I got a real sense of fulfillment. Yet, it was totally disregarded by this world. I get used to seeing my songs ignored and my expectations failed. Big sales or admiration are no longer such a big deal to me. I just wish my new song would reach someone and help her or him in some way when it’s released a few months later. I hope my songs are heard by those who need them, and play an important role in their lives. I believe it will happen, somehow…

Formula 1 Team Owner’s Misery hr567

As an avid fan of Formula One racing, I spend every winter longing for a season opener. My long wait was finally coming to an end with ten days to go until the first race. That was when the bad news arrived instead of the race. A Japanese TV network station that had been broadcasting Formula One for decades announced a termination to a free broadcast of the sport. They would no longer broadcast it, starting this season. My dream is to live in Monaco as a team owner of Formula One and I thought I had striven to get closer to the dream little by little. On the contrary, I was left far from it now that even watching Formula One on TV got taken away from me. I scoured on the Internet but didn’t find any website for free streaming of the race. The only way to watch it in Japan was through cable TV that cost about $25 a month. Paying money for a broadcast that I was accustomed to watching free all the time is quite undesirable. But when I looked into the cable station further, I found out that would broadcast live all three free practices, adding to the qualifying and the race. While I had been resigned to watching taped, delayed, edited and cut versions of only the qualifying and the race through free broadcasting for years, the cable station would let me watch all sessions of every venue live. It meant a significant upgrade for my Formula One life, and I decided to subscribe it. Watching live broadcasting for all sessions of all Formula One races around the world would be absolutely fascinating. On TV, I sometimes see VIPs watching the race on a TV screen in an elegant paddock lounge while having champagne and appetizers although they were at the circuit and could get a direct viewing of the real cars. If VIPs at the race venue watch it on a TV screen, it would be similar when I watch it live on my TV screen, except for my small apartment, cheap wine and junk food. It would be gorgeous enough for me to feel like I had become a team owner who attends all the venues. I thought $25 was inexpensive for an imaginary taste of dream-come-true. But once I got down to sign up for a subscription, I encountered an annoying process. Despite this high-tech age, I needed to ask for contract papers, fill them out, send them back, receive a tuner and set it up to my TV set. The season opener that is regarded as a celebration among the people concerned was ten days away and it was impossible to be all set by then. What a misery it is that a fake team owner would miss the festive first race of the season. I learned what $25-a-month could do at best…