Friday, January 6, 2017
Gold Dust hr584
“Would you believe it if I said gold dust could fall on you?” I was
asked out of nowhere by Kuri-chan who sat behind me in the classroom
when I was a senior in high school. I had known her since junior high
and we had chatted casually all the time. Although we had never belonged
to the same group to hang around, the last year of high school made us
closer as we were in the same class sitting next to each other. She
abruptly asked this question with strange solemnity, looking set on
confiding her big secret. I had never seen her like this. While I had no
idea what she was implying with the question, I answered I would. I
thought someone who was seeing the meteor shower was so excited that she
or he felt that gold dust was showering on her or him. Or, someone
having the happiest moment in the snow might feel the snow gold. Or,
gold dust was simply an analogy to an inconceivable happening that made
someone very happy. Those thoughts led my answer to yes, on which
Kuri-chan hesitantly began to explain her question. She had visited
frequently a certain shrine where gold dust fell on a person who
believed. And she wanted me to come. I promptly asked her if it had ever
fallen on her. She said it hadn’t because she hadn’t believed enough.
Then I asked if she had ever seen it fall on anyone. Her reply was no
and she added, “But there are people who have seen it.” My head got
filled with doubt and questions. How often does it happen? How much does
gold fall when it happens? By what size? How is it collected when it is
sprinkled all over her or him? Are a broom and a dustpan provided near
at hand? Don’t other people scramble for the fallen dust to steal it?
How do you declare it as yours? And when you collect it safely, where
should it be brought? Can it be cashed out? Does it fall at a time with
an enough amount to make a living? I couldn’t subdue my curiosity,
greed, and weird self-confidence. What if it fell on me today? Actual
gold dust, not an analogy, could be possible when it comes to me. I
followed Kuri-chan to the shrine after school, feeling as if I was going
to a casino, although I sensed it was some sort of cult. The shrine was
in the vast, luxurious premises. There were many people in the main
hall, mostly middle-aged and elderly. They were intently praying, which
seemed waiting for gold dust to me. A large framed portrait of the
founder of the religious sect was hung on the front wall of the hall.
Kuri-chan told me that gold dust fell on him first. I somehow refrained
from asking her if he built this cult with the money from that gold
dust. In my mind, though, I was thinking it would fall quite an amount. I
sat face to face with Kuri-chan inside the hall and she put her hand
above my forehead. She was going to pray for me and gold dust would fall
on me if I believed. I was told to keep my eyes closed until the
praying was over. It lasted for about five minutes and I believed hard
that gold dust was falling on me now. “It’s done,” She said. I opened my
eyes and looked for the dust around me. None. I asked her, “Didn’t only
a bit fall?” She smiled wanly and said no, looking surprised that I
thought it would happen to me on the first try. I was led to a small
room for a new comer. A group of ten new comers was greeted by an
unnaturally friendly middle-aged woman. She told the story about gold
dust falling on the founder but didn’t explain how to cash it out to the
end. When we were leaving, a woman who was an acquaintance of Kuri-chan
ran toward us and said hello. She offered a ride to the bus stop. She
casually asked where I lived. She said she knew the area well and would
drive me home. I began to feel uncomfortable. I declined repeatedly, but
she insisted strongly. The car finally stopped near my house and I said
goodbye. To my surprise, she told me to let her meet my parents. I
asked why and she said she wanted to tell the story about the gold dust
to my parents. She gave me a ride to recruit. I was too stupid to know
earlier. I said my parents were out for work, but she said she would
wait. I said they would come home late because they were farmers, but
she was adamant about waiting. I asked her to leave, but she wouldn’t
let me out of the car. I felt scared as if I was kidnapped. Kuri-chan
joined me and asked the woman to let me go home. With repeated angry
begging from two of us, she finally gave in and released me. Next day at
school, Kuri-chan apologized to me about how it had gone. “It should
never be that way. Trust me. I didn’t know that woman was wicked”, she
said regretfully. A few days later, she asked me to go to the shrine
together again. I rejected. She asked, “Why? You said you believed gold
dust would fall.” I still believed it but wasn’t interested in the cult.
I thought if gold dust fell on me, it would happen anyway, with or
without a cult. I’ve never joined a cult. But the fact remains that I
believe in miracles…